The benefits of being kind

How can you cultivate kindness and unlock the benefits of being kind?

CREDIT: This is an edited version of an article that originally appeared on Calmer

Cultivating kindness doesn’t just make us feel good in the moment, it also has lasting benefits for our well-being. Here are some practical ways you can start cultivating kindness today.

Self-compassion

The first step to cultivating kindness is to be kind to yourself by practising more self-compassion. This means being aware of your own feelings and emotions and treating yourself with the same kindness, understanding, and compassion that you would show to a friend.

It’s also important to take care of yourself physically and mentally. Be sure to prioritise good quality sleep, as well as exercise and eating healthy food. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, or stressed, give yourself permission to take a bit of time out for yourself to relax and rejuvenate.

By taking care of yourself, you’ll achieve greater personal happiness and be in a much better position to be kind to others.

Be mindful

Mindfulness is about being present in the moment, without judgment, and letting go of any distracting thoughts or worries about the past and future. When you’re mindful, you’re able to focus on what’s happening around you, and even notice important things that you would have otherwise missed; this can include the needs of others and opportunities to help them.

Practising mindfulness can help you to cultivate more patience, tolerance and understanding. When you’re mindful, you’re less likely to get caught up in your own thoughts and react impatiently or angrily to someone; instead, you’re more likely to be able to see things from different perspectives and respond in ways that are considerate and helpful.

Show gratitude

One of the most effective ways to cultivate kindness is to show gratitude – being thankful for the good things in your life, no matter how big or small they may be.

It’s easy to take the good things for granted; however, when you pause to appreciate them, you may realise that your life is full of blessings. When you see all the good in your life, it serves as a positive reminder that there’s good in the world. This can help you to feel more optimistic and hopeful which, in turn, can lead to more personal happiness.

One of the easiest ways to express gratitude is to say, ‘Thank you’; those two little words can make all the difference to someone who doesn’t hear them often. You can also show gratitude in other ways, such as giving compliments, doing favours, or just being there for someone who’s been there for you.

By showing your gratitude you let others know that what they do is appreciated and valued. As a result, they’re more likely to want to be helpful, kind, and considerate.

Smile more

Smiling is one of the easiest ways to cultivate kindness; it’s a universal sign of happiness, friendship, and goodwill. When you smile, you immediately feel better and more positive – and when you smile at others, you can make them feel good too.

Practice active listening 

If you want to help others, it’s important to know how. What do they need? What are their struggles and challenges? What can you do to support them?

The best way to find out is to ask and then actively listen to their response; this means really paying attention to what the other person is saying and trying to understand their perspective – not just waiting for your turn to speak.

Listen to their words and pay attention to their body language and tone of voice. This will give you a better understanding of how they’re feeling and what they might need.

Give others the benefit of the doubt 

Sometimes people do things that bother us or that we don’t understand; it’s easy to get upset, and jump to conclusions, but try your best to give them the benefit of the doubt instead. It takes strengths to do this and definitely some practice.

When you give others the benefit of the doubt you show that you’re willing to see the best in people; this is an act of kindness that can help to give you peace of mind, and experience a better mood.

Perform acts of kindness

Of course, a quintessential way to cultivate kindness is through random acts of kindness – selfless acts performed without expecting anything in return.

Your kindness can lead both you and the recipient of your kindness to feel good and your kind act may also inspire them to do something kind for someone else – before you know it, your random act of kindness will have started a chain reaction of kindness that spreads throughout the community.